Current location:	HERE TO DELIVER SOME BAD LUCK
Current mood:	EMO KID
Current music:	Lawyers, Guns and Money - Warren Zevon
Entry tags:	cheer up little emo kid, rant rant raaaaaaaant

self-bashing rant (+3 emo)
Why do I still not have any emo icons?


Why am I so very very pathetic? I almost feel like I have to be at least a writer/artist/whatever to even talk to BNFs. I mean, I only just learned what BNF even MEANS. I tried to friend kylandra, but didn't, just because I was too shy to ask if we could be friends. I haven't even asked peroxidepest17, even though I've commented her fics plenty of times...and I only just now emailed the Anime World Order (although they really ARE BNFs to be feared...)

The only well-known authors that I've been brave enough to talk to are dual_avi and kiyala. They were both so nice to me, so why can't I just pluck up my courage?

Maybe it's something to do with my own sheer stupidity. For example: I joined the OrgLIX forums. Everyone seemed so nice, that I decided to try it. The mods were all very nice and welcoming, but I made a really dumb mistake. I decided that my avatar would be one that I'd been sent by a friend of mine. It turned out that one of the mods, tenshi_ryuu, was the one who made the icon, and I most definitely did not have permission to use it. I apologized profusely, and she told me I could use the icon. But I was so scared of her hating me or something, that I took the icon down and never returned to the forums.

I'm not blaming tenshi_ryuu for this at all. I just wish I could go back. The forum looks like so much fun.

Sorry for this retarded piece of useless. I'm going to sleep.